Cyanide and Happiness

Some winners from the greatest comic on the web:












If you aren't offended enough yet, you can see the entire archive at explosm.

Why We Are So Damn Clever

The World's Worst Album Art...Ever.

Some people should not be allowed to interact with the general, relatively decent public, ever, nevermind be given record deals!

Here are ten of the finest examples of bad taste ever produced, thank God they don't come with sound!




Did the big funny looking guy really have to be at the front?





The trees, the dummy and the multiple voices in her head!!



Can I borrow a Feeling.....so I can sell it to buy more meth?




Devastatin' Dave- nuff said, word to your mother!



If you see these guys anywhere run, run faster than you've ever fucking run!



Millie is wild, I hope she doesn't read this, she'll fuck me up!



Latino hotness in denim pant!



I'm not gonna comment on this one, I feel bad enough already.



The rat on Jim's upper lip always hated shower time, fortunately it didn't happen often.


And my Favourite, it's just the background and font I don't like, Joyce is a Belter!!

The Reddest Royal

Man this guy goes red when he's drunk/cold/nervous/happy/excited!!! Anyway here's Prince Harry pissed and pissed of with a pap, these Royals are so graceful. Harry is leaving for Iraq in a few weeks and thats a good enough excuse to get wankmonkeyed, seeing as his tour of duty is a publicity stunt that could go horribly, horribly wrong!!





Maybe him and Brit should get together!!

Grindhouse

"Back-to-back movies featuring Uncensored sexuality and Hardcore thrills" coming our way:

Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino have managed to create an entire genre comprised of movies made the way they want to make them. Elevating schlock to art and reinventing B-grade, straight to video subject matter with the help of crazy techniques and mad skill. Pulp Fiction, Desperado, Reservoir Dogs, Once Upon a Time in Mexico, Kill Bill and Sin City are some of the most influential films of our generation, and still nobody even attempts to emulate their raw, kick-ass impact.



Their new project is called "Grindhouse" and is made up of two feature length films, intended to be shown back-to-back, Rodriguez' "Planet Terror" and Tarantino's"Death Proof".

One awesome cast, two great directors, it's gonna be bloody, and funny, and brilliant.

Remember This??:

Jules: What does Marcellus Wallace look like?
Brett: What?
Jules: What country you from?
Brett: What?
Jules: What ain't no country I ever heard of! They speak English in What?
Brett: What?
Jules: ENGLISH, MOTHERFUCKER! DO-YOU-SPEAK-IT?
Brett: Yes!
Jules: Then you know what I'm saying!
Brett: Yes!
Jules: Describe what Marcellus Wallace looks like!
Brett: What, I-?
Jules: [pointing his gun] Say what again. SAY WHAT AGAIN. I dare you, I double dare you, motherfucker. Say what one more goddamn time.
Brett: He's b-b-black...
Jules: Go on.
Brett: He's bald...
Jules: Does he look like a bitch?
Brett: What?
[Jules shoots Brett in shoulder]
Jules: DOES HE LOOK LIKE A BITCH?
Brett: No!
Jules: Then why you try to fuck him like a bitch, Brett?
Brett: I didn't.
Jules: Yes you did. Yes you did, Brett. You tried to fuck him. And Marcellus Wallace don't like to be fucked by anybody, except Mrs. Wallace.

They Can Fly!!

Going on a diving trip to Mozambique tomorrow, can't wait.
In my excitement I've been looking at pics of fish and things.
Found some amazing pictures of flying Manta and Mobulas Rays at Malbertphoto!!



I need to see that shit for real!!

SA Paintings' Grandmaster

Robert Hodgins' new solo exhibition began it's run at the Goodman Gallery on Saturday,
went past on Friday on the off chance that the paintings would be up already and ran into none other than the Man himself, at 86 years old he is still passionate and prolifically churns out superb work, SA's finest (in my opinion), comparisons with the great Francis Bacon are inevitable (and justified) and he's a really nice guy!



The body of work that Hodgins has created for this exhibition moves away from his typical humorous depiction of the human condition, to an exploration of the darker side of humanity, drawing inspiration from a combination of ancient history such as the 'The Battle of Cascina' and stories of giants, to contemporary wars, torture, and soldiers.



Go see it, get some culture, be moved.

Gibbsy, My Boy!!

One over, six sixes, $1Million for charity!!

This is Getting Ridiculous!!

Inland Knights (Drop Music!),
Carfax,
30 March!!

Mzansi is going Looney!!

I fuckin' love this place, and apparently so do the rest of the world!
In the past two weeks we got to see Ame, Steve Bug and Jake Childs live (3 nights, 3 of my heroes) and it doesn't stop there!!
On Tuesday 20th March, Japanese Jazz/Hip-Hop/Trip-Hop innovator/god Dj Krush will be playing at Carfax!!





And then.......on the 31st of March Taboo is hosting super-hot french lounge Dj Stephane Pompougnac (of Hotel Costes fame)











P.S: Spoke to Jake Childs last Wednesday, he has decided to give up his home in New York City (where he is surrounded by his friends who just happen to be all the best house producers in the world) to move to S.A in October, what a guy!!!

I don't know how to deal with all this so I am going to switch my computer off now before it tries to tell me that Portishead are playing in my bedroom tomorrow night.

A Letter to the Instigator:

It may already be Wednesday, but I'm still feeling the effects of another crazy-ass weekend.

Dear Alcohol,

First and foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around for the holidays, hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends\girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone the middle of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a taco with extra hot sauce, along with a big Italian meatball, a chili-dog, some stale chips, washed down with wine and topped off with a Kit Kat after a few cheese curls and chili cheese fries? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black and blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evenings debauchery may be in order, but the 3 p.m. hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin, McDonald's) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of stale popcorn, the hangover should be minimal and in no way interfere with my daily activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now and would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation of much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above and address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions and hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
Your biggest fan.

***************************************************************

Thanks Megs.

The Kids of Today!!

Glad to see kids are being influenced by the right role models!!
Thanks Carl.

Dreams of Miss X

Agent Provocateur make some of the most beautiful lingerie in the world:



Now they have teamed up with director Mike Figgis (Leaving Las Vegas) to make a series of short films called the Dreams of Miss X featuring the most gorgeous coke-whore in the world.
Check them out here, surreal, eerie, awesome.

Iconoclast Picasa Album

All the pics ever published (present and future) on Iconoclast are now available for your viewing pleasure at Picasa.

Get Well Soon Manto!

Yes, it's another condom commercial but while Manto is still in hospital, I feel it is only right that I use my considerable influence to further the cause of the SA Health Ministry in educating the youth against the dangers of unprotected sex. It's a heavy burden to bear but the smiles on your faces make it all worth while.

Remember, if it looks like there's gonna be a storm, take a raincoat!

Durex Ads: Fucking Brilliant! (Pun?, Me?, Never.)

Some of the greatest Print-media ads of all time, all by Durex:







Thanks X, love your hair hope you win!!

Rio Carnival

Amazing 360 Degree VR photos of the biggest party in the world:



I'm booking my ticket for 2008 now!!

Time's week in Pictures

Time magazine's weekly retrospective in photographs, always awesome.
Check it out here.

Unseen Borat DVD Extra

Do you mind if I make hand relief!!

Oh My!

Just so you don't forget which day of the week it is.
Courtesy of FHMsa.co.za

Robbie Williams on Little Britain

Bloody Poof!!

Crazy New Tech

Wireless Power!!!

Snip the last cords on your desk. Wireless “power strips,” developed by Pennsylvania-based Powercast, transmit energy from an outlet as radio waves. Add-on chips for low-power devices, such as cellphones, convert those waves into electricity when the items come within a few feet. The first products debut this year.




Monitor in your pocket!!

Flexible e-ink screens, as easy on the eyes as newsprint, will wirelessly grab the documents you need when you enter a meeting. You can then unfurl them on the train or switch over to the newspaper. Researchers at Dutch company Polymer Vision have created flexible circuitry that bonds to displays at low temperatures so that screens can bend without melting or breaking. Now they’re working on circuits for high-resolution 8½-by-11-inch displays.

You have to love them geeks!

NewWebPick8

New Web Pick have just released issue 8 of their brilliant e-zine.
You can download the free version here.
It's quite a large package (+/-65mb) but it's well worth it.
The magazine is a showcase for bleeding edge contemporary design, photography, architecture and more. This issue is packed with beautiful shit including an interview with TRONIC and the best CG illustration I have ever seen.



TRONIC studios

300 Trailer

Trailer for the new Frank Miller-inspired movie 300.
Like Sin-City, it promises to be super-stylised and visually sumptuous, nobody can make violence look as beautiful as Frank Miller does.

Steve Bug in Jozi!!

Things aren't so bad after all:



For more info check out JHB live.
See you there!

Great Advice from a Great Man

Pearls of wisdom from the Fast Show's Swiss Tony.